Honest Dreams
In a session this morning, one of the brilliant coaches I work with asked me about the difference between brain storming for goals and brainstorming for actions to take to reach those goals.
On the surface, It sounds like a technical question, but it's actually so much deeper than that.
When we brainstorm to choose actions that we’re going to take in pursuit of our goals, it's tactical. Your best guess on the path forward. But when we brainstorm for our overall goals, that's not an act of logic.
That's playing in the realm of possibility.
It’s dangling our feet in the pool of infinite potential and incredible future experiences.
It's an act of mental and emotional magic.
And yet, so many of us cut that magic down to size. We base what we think is possible for our future on our past.
Or on what other people think is reasonable.
On what's “expected”. On what feels safe and acceptable.
So often when I ask a coach what their goals are they will inevitably say “I want to hit six figures.” and then they are so surprised when the only thing they feel for their goal is pressure, fear and a sense of disconnect from the very thing they say they want.
It's because their goal isn't tied to possibility or truth. It’s tied to safety.
As coaches, brainstorming our futures in this way creates a huge limitation.
Because we are in the business of possibility.
The whole reason why people come to coaches is because they want to be held and supported as they chase futures that currently feel impossible and unrealistic.
If we as the coach aren't willing to step out and explore our own unlimited potential futures in an honest way, how can we hold the space for a client's crazy big dreams?
How can we show them that we believe in their wildly unique desires, if we aren't able to acknowledge our own.
As I write this, I’m sitting at the kitchen table. In the middle of the day with the whole afternoon open so that I can read, write and potter around. My time is absolutely my own to spend on what is meaningful to me.
The kitchen window overlooks a section of our beautiful 15 acre property, nestled in the hills and woods. My space is my own to love and care for.
My laptop is sharing the table with several baskets, filled to the brim with gifts and tasty treats. Thank you’s from my husband and I to people that we've connected with in our local community this year. Those baskets are worth a small fortune, a representation of us being able to share our abundance with those around us. My wealth is my own to use in ways that feel good.
Later today I’ll be coaching and mentoring exceptional people who contribute to making a massively powerful and positive impact on the world through their work. I get to participate in that impact by helping each of them grow. My purpose is my own to pursue and foster.
I am living the full life that I envisioned and curated in detail 6 years ago when I finally admitted that I was chasing a version of success that felt hollow and impossible to get excited about.
When I imagine my dream future, I focus on the beauty of the experiences I want to have. The way that I’ll spend my time. How I want to impact the world and the legacy that I want to leave behind.
Something that can't be summed up in “Be a six figure coach” and can't be attained by focusing on a goal that is so vague and disconnected from who I am.
Do you know how hard it is to become a "6 Figure Coach" when you don't actually care about making 6 figures!?
And how much easier it was to sail past the 6 figure mark when I allowed myself to be led by the truth of why I wanted that money in the first place?
So the next time you start to ask yourself what your goals or vision for the future is… let yourself imagine something that makes your body tingle and resonate with truthful longing. Be More specific. More unconventional. More honest.
More YOU
